THE MOST OF THE WAITING

It’s been a while since we’ve had a Lulu lesson. Have you been missing her? She’s always up for grabs, in case anyone was wondering 😉

Just as a warning for all who think she is adorable and snuggly: Yesterday, while she was taking up a large portion of the space on my bed, I attempted to cuddle with her, and was met with a growl. A GROWL.

You have been properly cautioned, and I hope those with this mindset make better judgement calls in the future.

This blog is a little all over the place, but I can already tell it is going to be a fun one to write, so, please humor me. Also, as another heads-up, this post is going to feel a little ranty. Probably because I have been feeling a little ranty lately 😉

Alright, let’s finally get started.

Lulu, the basset hound, fancies herself a mighty hunter. Despite the obvious setback of her less-than-lengthy legs, she has full confidence that if any type of animal set foot on our land, she’d be more than capable of eradicating that problem. Bunnies? Cows? Antelope? Any and all do not stand a chance against Lularooo.

Her latest target? A gopher.

She and said gopher have been in a standoff for months. Day in and day out, she parks herself by the newest hole the creature has created, ready to spring into action the moment it rears its ugly head.

I must give Lulu some sort of credit here. One time, under her diligent guard duty, she did indeed lead me to the culprit. Unfortunately, the critter, and his hole, were just on the other side of the fence. Just like in the picture included.

Alright, time to pivot the topic to my life. This is my blog, after all, even if Lulu has her sights set on being the star.

I’m not married. It’s a fact we all know, sometimes the fact about me that seems to be of most interest to those around me 😂 Especially as of late. I’m not sure if it’s the whole turning thirty thing (I am sure. This is the reason.), but those I love are getting very worried, and they are not afraid to show it.

Now, I don’t want anyone to feel like I am attacking them, singling them out, or that I’m upset with them. I promise, I know it comes from a place of deep, deep love. I honestly think it’s pretty funny most of the time. I solemnly swear there is no offense taken here.

However, I just thought it would be nice to show you things from my perspective. Give everyone a look through my eyes.

If we all will recall, in January I declared the year 2025 His year. I wanted to do my very best to follow where He led me, and I really think I have done that to the best of my ability. I’m proud of myself. I relased my first book, took on callings and tasks that I thought somewhat impossible, learned to truly trust Him in some pretty difficult trials, and grew into a person I like a lot more. All with His help, of course. It was His year, as we have been reminded.

However, the place where I feel like I have really put myself out there the most in 2025 was the dating world. Marriage terrifies me most days, but I know deep in my heart that it is something I want, and that it is something the Lord wants for me. So, praying for bravery and guidance, I have stepped out as He has asked me to.

I attended a Young Single Adult church congregation for the first time since I was at BYU ten years ago.

I also participated in some of the activities this congregation put on.

I have been trying to be more active in the limited Young Single Adult activities that my local congregations host.

I went to a large, regional Young Single Adult conference in Dallas. (Remember? That’s where I met the armadillo!)

And finally, I tried online dating. Again.

For some, that might not seem like a lot, but for me? The Scaredy Cat of South Eastern New Mexico? These were huge steps. And even if they didn’t turn up fruitful, I am so incredibly proud of myself for developing a deeper relationship with my Savior and trusting Him enough to follow His gentle pushes. They were all worthwhile endeavors, and huge blessings in my life.

Which, brings me to my final point: I trust Him. I really, really trust Him. He has literally never led me astray. Why would His involvement in my love life be any different?

I’m alright with waiting. I’m ok with the fact that it’s not right this second. I trust His completely perfect timing. Which is why I refuse to be a Lulu in this situation.

You thought it wasn’t going to come back around to the dog, didn’t you? 😉

See, Lulu’s whole focus, the thing that captures all of her attention, is that silly gopher. She anxiously waits, all day, for her nemesis to appear. She has gone without water (which I lovingly forced her to consume), baked in the heat, worn herself ragged, and literally sat by a hole in the ground for hours on end, for nothing to happen. Literally, nothing.

Her efforts are fruitless. She can’t force it. And, let’s be honest, she look a little desperate.

Ok, not really. But, I had to relate all of the points back to me. And I would. I would look desperate, if I focused my entire life on finding someone. Believe it or not, obsession is not always an attractive quality.

And, like Lulu, even with all of that devotion, my efforts could still come up fruitless. Because, I also can’t force it. If it’s not the Lord’s time, it’s not the Lord’s time, and I do not want to risk ending up with the wrong person because I wanted things to happen in my timetable instead of His.

I really do trust Him.

Which, is why, this is not the sole focus of my life. I’m sorry, it’s just not. I have so many wonderful things going on right now. The Lord has given me different purposes in my waiting, and He is helping me to make the most of the waiting. When I finally allowed Him in, every corner of my world turned brighter. He has helped me to see that I am right where He wants me to be.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I know I have to try. I assure you, I am aware of that. But, I feel like I have been, right? I feel like this year I have really tried my best to step into that journey, rather than laying it aside. I have done my best to faithfully follow the pull of His hand.

It’s just not the thing that captures my permanent attention. I’m trying, and sometimes failing, to make Him the center of my life. And I feel like if I keep doing that, He will lead me to the love of my life when the time is right.

Until then, I’m happy to make the most of the waiting. And never become a Lulu. Never, ever.

Ok, rant over. Love you guys!